Friday, September 08, 2006

Pluto Publishing Plans

Dear Book Publishers:

While you are oh-so-very busy NOT PUBLISHING my work, I was wondering if you could correct a few hundred thousand science books, text books, monographs and what-all that refer to Pluto as a planet.

Please don't just append existing titles. Get creative. Create a some brand new ones.

Here are a few suggestions to get you started:

Self-Help Section
Chicken Soup for the Former Planet

Political
"We're Invading Pluto Because I Bet That's Where Plutonium Comes From" by G.W. Bush

For Conspiracy Theorists
"Exposing the International Astronomical Union as a Plutocracy"
"Pluto Isn't a Planet, and the Disney Character is the Only Non-Speaking Non-Clothed Animal: Coincidence?"

For the Indecisive
"Did we say Nine? We meant Eight"
"Wait, Maybe There's Twelve"
"Perhaps We Could Meet Again Next Year"

For teens:
"Monster Garage: Dwarf My Planet"
"This Affects Me How?"
"If it's Not on My iPod, Who Cares?"

Grade School
"One Less Ping Pong Ball Needed for the Science Fair"
"My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nothing"
"Pluto? Wasn't he Popeye's Friend?"



1 comment:

The dykes next door said...

Perfect! I don't know where how you think these things up...but you are right on target with these! I especially liked the Political title and the teens section. And they aren't publishing your stuff? I'd buy it.