Let's Just Monitor This One

CASSELBERRY, FLORIDA -- Police say they're sure they shot a 4-foot-long, 80-pound monitor lizard that had been lurking in an Orlando suburb for months. Eighty pounds? Hardly. More like 18. Did it breathe fire, too?

Still, neighbors aren't ready to let their children or pets back outside until they see a carcass.The lizard didn't bite anyone, but police officers were authorized to kill it because of the potential danger it posed to small children and animals. Oh, but they're not authorized to shoot child molesters? Only innocent animals?

An officer shot the reptile twice Sunday but wasn't close enough to catch it before the animal scampered into a retention pond, said Lt. Dennis Stewart of the Casselberry Police Department. Sounds like it is good and angry now... and by the way, it's nesting season! Bet she's pissed.

Authorities said the lizard was likely a pet that escaped or was illegally dumped. Sad but true. Invasive species are a huge problem created by human idiots.

Oooh! Scary.