Massive Affective Disorder

Could we have one whole day without any precipitation, people???? I am so sick of this weather! I am moving to Puerto Rico and going on welfare. This is one of the snowiest winters on record and someone said today, "think how much we'll appreciate summer when it gets here."

When? How about if? Gee, sorry if I seem a little on the glass half-full side, but the way my life has been going about the most I can hope for is a record heat wave while my air conditioner breaks. Between the Dick Cheeney 'faulty intelligence' weather reports and Acts of God brought to you by Maytag, it's a wonder I get out of bed in the mornings.

Think the little rat heard about my plan to make mittens out of him?