A local school district is looking for community input regarding a mascot and school colors for their new North High School.
Since the only reason this shiny new school is needed is my arch-nemisis, Rampant Development, I can't help but want to weigh in with a few suggestions.
School colors Gold and Red - Gold for the Century 21 Real Estate jackets and red for the bloodshed of the developers as they fought to put in the highest-desity housing imaginable at the greatest loss of trees and wildlife. What's the opposite of 'green'? Black? Yellow and Black, then.
The mascot should be a greedy developer with little devil horns and a tear by his eye. He can be turning his empty pockets out as he sobs that he has no money to give to the schools because he spent it all on curbs and cul-de-sacs for his sub-standard contracting. Boo-Hoo. We can call the team the Whining Rich White Guys or something.
Kids love animals - perhaps the mascot could be a deer with a little hobo bandana on a stick as he is driven from his woodland home, now paved over with asphault and traffic lights. We could call him Displaced Buck, a nod to how all the money in town went to giving the developer and big-box stores tax breaks rather than textbooks for the kids.
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