More Tiger Tales

...He said when we left the zoo, 'The next time, let's see the penguins being fed instead of a tiger eating a woman.' I did not want to scare him by saying that this was unusual."

Speculation continues to swirl around the tiger attack at the San Francisco Zoo. I expect any day now to see an auction notice in the San Francisco Chronicle detailing used camels up for bid and listing the penguins as a lot....

The whole incident once again proves that you don't have to run faster than a tiger, just faster than your slowest friend.

The first attack happened right outside the tiger’s enclosure — Sousa died at the scene. Another was about 300 yards away, in front of the zoo cafe. The police chief said the animal was mauling one of the survivors, and when officers yelled at it to stop, it turned toward them and they opened fire.

So... let me get this straight...

The police commanded the tiger to stop mauling? Then used lethal force? Wow, that's more than most human offenders get! Wonder how a tiger responds to a taser?

Wait! Did they yell at the tiger in English? Spanish? Everyone knows you should yell at a Siberian Tiger in her native Yupik, right?

And this is just disgusting!! Right when you get your hopes up that natural selection works, comes this disturbing (albeit expected) news:

The brothers who survived the vicious tiger attacks at San Francisco Zoo last week have hired legal pit bull Mark Geragos in anticipation of filing a lawsuit against the zoo.

Geragos, who is known for his roster of high-profile clients from Michael Jackson and Winona Ryder to Scott Peterson and Susan McDougal, is already making claims about what he says is the zoo's "utter disregard for safety." His new clients, brothers Paul and Kulbir Dhaliwal, were released from San Francisco General Hospital Saturday and are recovering from injuries sustained in the attack that killed their friend, Carlos Sousa Jr.

"There are some very disturbing facts yet to come out about what happened," Geragos told ABCNews.com. "One of the brothers had absolutely no reason to be attacked. After Carlos was attacked, this brother ran to the zoo café and they would not let him in. The same guys who sold him nachos wouldn't let him back in. They locked the doors. Thirty minutes later, he was attacked by the tiger."

Ok, so if that's true, the tiger had to hunt him down to attack a second time. So exactly how bad did they taunt her? Thirty minutes and he can't find anywhere else to hide? Suing the zoo? They should file a counter suit. This is ridiculous.