Saturday, May 02, 2009

Mayday! Mayday! Mayday!

No, this isn't another post decrying the quality and workmanship of Maytag products.

(But Maytag STILL Sucks).

It's a screed on how the first day of May is apparently the moment OPEC turns its 40 Billionth dollar of profit for the calendar year - and stays on track to double that figure each month for the next four months - gas prices jumped thirty cents!!

This is an outrage. I drove around to four stations before finding nauseating-but-I-think-I-can-keep-last-night's-dinner-down prices at the shiny new station that for some reason always has pump software problems. This joint is pretty new, but their pumps are never working. Today, it was merely a sign that said you can't buy a car wash at the pump. I can deal with that. There have been plenty of please pay inside days, we can't give you a receipt at the pump days and plain old gas isn't even pumping days. But, they do have among the best prices I can find, so I suffer through it. Also, this is the joint I discovered gives a free 16 oz. coffee with fill-up. Flavored coffee.

So at these prices, I figure they owe me a Styrofoam cup and the two Splendas I slipped in my purse. As I'm pumping, a '67 red Corvette** convertible with side pipes goes by, just to make me feel even more inadequate. Angrily, I stuff a plastic straw into my Styrofoam cup of steaming Hazelnut Cream Joe.

Go ahead carcinogenic chemicals released from the plastic. Make my day!*

Slurp! Ahhh... nothing tastes as good as FREE.

*All this fury from a woman who just left an hour and half long Yoga class. Imagine how stressed I'd be without it.
**Just in case you're not into cars, this is like the Holy Grail of automobiles.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

There is 1 that tops the 67 though.
It would also be a Corvette 1963 Split Window numbers matching(of course) fuel injected with the 36 gallon tank.
Can you say Tanker boys and girls LOL