Monday, April 28, 2008

You Go, Gill

This is disgusting!!! A massive fish hunt is underway to try and kill the 16ft. Great White suspected of killing a swimmer off the coast of California. Swim, swim little shark! Go to Australia! Cuba! Just get away!!

Authorities now are convinced the shark that attacked Martin was a 15- to 16-foot great white because of the marks it left on Martin's legs.

Witch hunt is more like it... there's no way they are going to find the right shark, and even if they did:

A) There's no proof it would ever attack a human again (which is why the entire person is never consumed, the shark is looking for seal, and humans aren't as fatty and thus tasty as a seal)

B) It wouldn't stop any further attacks, as there are other sharks out there

C) After a few days, the human remains would no longer be in the shark's digestive system, making positive identification impossible.

Some species, such as the great white and mako, ensure food is dealt with quickly by having a body that is warmer than the surrounding seawater and a warm stomach. A Mako, therefore, is able to digest a meal within one or two days, whereas other hunters, such as the blue shark, take an average of three days to digest a similar quantity of food.

Have none of these people seen Jaws?

California authorities closed 17 miles of San Diego County beach during the weekend as they searched for the shark.

Sorry, Police Chief Brody, we can't close the beaches on a holiday weekend! Imagine the lost tourist dollars.

It's just going to be a circus of slaughter, with innocent sharks as the losers. Does no one watch the Discovery Channel? Sharks do not acquire a taste for human flesh. Sharks do not hunt man as prey. Sharks are endangered!! People are taking a bath in their living room and then complaining about the hospitality.

For stupid media accounts, click here and see Barbara Walters make unfunny jokes about sharks and the family of the deceased's devotion to the ocean.

1 comment:

KaneCitizen said...

This just means that people are tired of 9/11. SharkAttackMania was in full swing the summer and early fall of 2001, too.