I’ve Been Reading

Baghdad Burning II – nowhere as good as the original, or am I just numb to her suffering?

Spot of Bother – excellent! What a writer! Mark made me care about a British family and made me turn pages wondering if a suicidal man would do the deed. Excellent!

Welcome to the Monkey House – short stories of Kurt Vonnegut
Who knew he could be so mundane? Stories of romance? Run of the mill science fiction? In some strange way I identify or aspire to his writing – clear, yet not afraid to deviate from the norm. Many stories were creative writing 101, period pieces evoking a bygone era. Yet a few have stood the test of time and are as relevant today as when they were written: Report on the Barnhouse Effect and Welcome to the Monkey House. Still, boilerplate sci-fi. Perhaps the genius is in the simplicity.

Listening to:


Eric Burdon. What ever happened to him? Love him. Guess I need to buy My Secret Life.

Robert Plant: The Principle of Moments. I'd buy a copy of him singing Happy Birthday, that's how much I love his voice. Although I must admit I can't stand Walking Into Clarksdale. Wonder why?

Awesome Advertisement

Received a cool postcard in the mail last month. It has three atomic elements in chart format across the top: #89, Actinium 227.0, #92 Uranium, 238.0, #88 Radium, 226.0. The abbreviations spell out AcURa. Below is a picture of a car with the caption: It's time for your Acura's periodic checkup. Regular maintenance is a key element of performance. Is that cool, or what??

Did you hear they just discovered element 118? How long can this go on, exactly? Can we trust any of these "discoveries"? I mean, something that exists for 1,000 th of a second? Is that even 'real'? It's like when I clean the guest bathroom and 1,000th of a second later Mr. Right walks in there to mess it up. Did it really count? Were my efforts cosmically recognized?

From the New York Times:

A team of Russian and American scientists said yesterday that it had created the heaviest element ever seen in a laboratory, a dab of matter that lasted for less than one-thousandth of a second but would add an entry at the farthest reaches of the periodic table and suggest that strange new elements may lie beyond.

Start writing that paper about elements in the seventh dimension now! By the time somebody disproves it, you'll be dead anyhow.

Hydrogen, the lightest element, has one proton in its nucleus, and uranium, the heaviest naturally occurring element, has 92. Element 118 would fit comfortably just below radon in a column of the periodic table containing what are called noble gases for their inert chemical properties.

Are there negative elements? Ones lighter than hydrogen? The bullemics of the periodic table? They attract protons, but heave them up right away?

The results were met with praise but also caution from other scientists in the field, particularly given the fraught history of element 118. Another California lab, the Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory, announced that it discovered the element in 1999 but retracted the claim two years later after an investigation found that one of its researchers, Dr. Victor Ninov, had fabricated data. Dr. Ninov was later fired.

Well I should hope so! Lying about seeing something for 1,000th of a second! Really now. I had no idea 'new elements' was such a competitive field. Getalifeium.

Dr. Gelbke said that there was one good reason that the Russian laboratory might be ahead of its competitors elsewhere in the world. Scientists at that lab, he said, are skilled in handling Californium, which is very radioactive and dangerous to the uninitiated.
“I wouldn’t want to do that myself,” Dr. Gelbke said, chucking. “It’s a fairly nasty substance for most people to handle.”

My guess is no one told the Russian scientists there might be any danger. Vomiting and glowing are common in the Chernobyl area. Nothing like a total lack of health and safety standards to abeit science.

The numbers 2, 8, 20, 28, 50 and 82 are magic for both protons and neutrons. The highest known magic number for neutrons alone is 126, meaning that common lead, with 82 protons and 126 neutrons, is the heaviest known “doubly magic,” or extremely stable, isotope in the periodic table.

Harry Potter and the Unknown Isotope

Cool!

You Are a Pegasus

You are a perfectionist, with an eye for beauty. You know how to live a good life - and you rarely deviate from your good taste. While you aren't outgoing, you have excellent social skills. People both admire you - and feel very comfortable around you.

What Mythological Creature Are You?

Yeah, Sounds About Right

Your Famous Last Words Will Be:

"I dunno, press the button and find out."

What Will Your Famous Last Words Be?

Mercury World Rocks!

So Al was done with his conference early and we explored the strip a little. He wanted to see the Venetian and Wynn so we took a walk around to sight-see. The ceiling art in the Venetian was cool; there was this ‘coronation’ mural I particularly enjoyed. If it were my casino, I would have subtly had my portrait substituted for the queen. Since the Egypt theme and Rome theme have already been done, I can’t imagine what kind of casino I would create. The fish thing has been done at Mandalay Bay, so what’s left? Turtles? Slow slots? I don’t think so. Cars? Route 66 Casino? I suppose. Maybe ancient Greece?

Soon it was time to head to the farewell festivities held at the Palms Hotel. I couldn’t believe they wanted to do something off-site. It involved bussing the 3000 attendees over to another casino across town. Al had signed me up for the event, but the event planners had no record of this. They told him he could pay $75 for a guest. I told him that was out of the question; I’d just go and if I got kicked out, fine. No loss. So we stood forever in this huge line waiting for a bus while organizers strolled up and down making sure everyone had a conference badge. I just pulled my shawl over my neck as if I was cold, and no one ever said anything. We were issued fancy printed maps of the Palms that detailed where the party venues were: pool, Buddha bar, Rain Nightclub and the Ghost Bar.

Once inside, there was food everywhere. Waitresses walked by with crab cakes, buffet tables were set up with different themes through out, and all kinds of bars serving drinks were available. Bands played, acrobats and fire-eaters performed, showgirls posed for pictures, it was quite the party. I went to this one food station where you were issued a pointy wooden skewer and marshmallows. Right as I went to toast it, the sterno died out. Turning to leave, I practically walk into a man dressed all in black speaking into a little headphone. “Fuel to Smores Two”, he says. No lie. The service was fantastic. Every time I put a plate down, a waiter rushed over and took it away.

In the nightclub there were girls dancing in cages above the DJ and projection screens created a water fall effect-when they weren’t flashing the Mercury World company logo. Hostesses were passing out glow sticks and goofy hats. Grown adults were putting on cellophane wigs, silly hats, false eyelashes, Mardi gras beads, cheap sunglasses, you name it. We decided to see what the Ghost Bar was all about on the 53rd floor. This entailed another long boring wait to get on the elevator going up, but was well worth the effort. In the middle of the modern décor was a chocolate fountain! An even better use of the little skewers! We stabbed some strawberries and pineapple chunks and coated them with the flowing chocolate for a fun treat and enjoyed some drinks out on the balcony overlooking the neon street scape. Very cool! I now wanted to buy their software with all upgrades. These folks knew how to throw a party!

We left a little early so we could catch a show over at Treasure Island, Mystere. It was “Salvador Dali Goes to the Circus” or “Dr. Seuss Drops Acid”. Very surrealistic, and some characters or costumes were right out of Dali paintings or Seuss books. I liked the acrobats and feats of strength. My favorite part was the trapeze artists doing flips while suspended from the ceiling with bungee cords. They costumes made them look like birds or leafy dragons (seahorses). One little acrobat missed her pyramid and fell down. She was rushed from the stage. For all I know, they took her out back and shot her. It wasn’t mentioned again. Ever.

The next morning we hung out by the pool a little before checking out. We enjoyed the big buffet again before heading to the airport. The airport was a mess. How any airport that busy could be that inefficient, I haven’t a clue. The lines were long, slow and confusing. It took us the whole two hours just to get to our gate. Once there, we learned that due to ‘high winds and snow’ in Chicago, our flight would be delayed. Great. I left the pool for this? I don’t ever want to go back!!

After sitting on the plane for almost two hours, we were finally given clearance for takeoff. As way of small compensation, the free in-flight movie was “Cars”. I have since been fortunate enough to score the Sally Hot Wheels toy I was so desperately seeking only a few months before. Seems they produced truckloads more for the holiday season. I would like to note that the bedding set only comes in Twin. What about us Queen size bed owning fans? And why didn’t they feature Sally on the sheets more prominently? It’s all Lightening and Mater. Two guy buddies. Oh, playing with girls is uncool… call the Christian Right. I’m sure they can read something into the relationship between the tow truck and racecar…

One other thing – what’s with the DVD release of the movie Cars? I notice that all the ad papers (Wal-Mart, Best Buy, Circuit City) do not advertise a price. What new little marketing ploy is this? How can I comparison shop? Just what I want – a flyer of unpriced merchandise. No thanks. (Although I would like to mention the movie makes a great gift idea for someone who really likes Route 66 and Owen Wilson, and little blue Porsches…Other great gift ideas include Corvette calendars and turtle calendars. Can you believe I didn’t get either last year???)

Words to Live By

“There is a theory which states that if ever for any reason anyone discovers what exactly the Universe is for and why it is here it will instantly disappear and be replaced

by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another that states that this has already happened.”

Douglas Adams

Growing Pains

Great. Our VCR just broke. I was really hoping to limp by, but there seems to be no hope. It’s about 8 or 9 years old at least. Maybe more. I wanted one with a really good freeze-frame picture quality so I paid quite a bit more than I needed to, but it’s very important to read what the little signs say during episodes of the Simpsons. I always tape the show and watch it a second time so I can catch any sight gags. So if anyone out there has a spare I can buy for $25, let me know. I have quite a few ‘unwatched’ TV shows recorded. If I buy a DVD burner, can that record off network TV or is that just for DVD to DVD transmission?

Saw an inspiring writer the other day, Judith Perlman, author of “Citizen’s Primer for Conservation Activism: How to Fight Development in Your Community”. One thing she mentioned right away was the fact that the book’s title had been selected for maximum hits on Google. Although she did not feel the book was about ‘fight development’, as she espouses ecologically responsible development, it was determined that anyone performing a keyword search would most likely use terms like ‘fight development’ before ‘conservation activism’. Her story was very inspiring, but as our local attendees discussed our unique problems, a depressing pall fell over the gathering. Our situation seems hopeless. There would be no fairy tale ending of defeating the evil developer and purchasing the property for a park as Ms. Perlman enjoyed. In a stage whisper I asked, “What is next week’s topic? Assisted Suicide? I could use something to cheer me up.” The guy in the seat ahead of me got a real kick out of it. What can I say? I’d be making lame jokes on my way to the gas chamber.

I’m sick of hearing local politicians say they are for ‘controlled growth’ or ‘intelligent growth’ or any of myriad euphemisms for “please don’t think I’m anti-growth”. Why not? Why can’t someone come right out and say NO? These are the same people who can’t train a dog or raise a child with any sense of boundaries. No is an unpleasant word. Let’s not use it. Or, to take a stand, they wouldn’t get elected. Perhaps they’ve already thrown in the towel. “You can’t stop growth”. Are you sure? Have you even tried? No, you let the developers and elected officials with self-serving interests make all your decisions for you. You don’t attack the root problems: the loss of the family farm to collectives. Um, hello, could you please take a look at say, China?

Speaking of China, the real problem is: too many people. What are you doing to decrease the birth rate? Control immigration? Sorry, but we have plenty of people and not enough spotted owls.

Words of Wisdom

If voting changed anything, they’d make it illegal.
Emma Goldman

Reality Check

Then-National Security Adviser Brent Scowcroft, who has been a critic of the younger Bush's policies, asked Gates to be his deputy in 1989 during the administration of Bush's father. The elder President Bush, a former CIA director himself, asked Gates to run the CIA two years later.

Gates won confirmation, but only after hearings in which he was accused by CIA officials of manipulating intelligence as a senior analyst in the 1980s.

Melvin Goodman, a former CIA division chief for Soviet affairs, testified that Gates politicized the intelligence on Iran, Nicaragua, Afghanistan and the Soviet Union. “Gates' role in this activity was to corrupt the process and the ethics of intelligence on all of these issues,” Goodman testified.

Gates is a close friend of the Bush family, and particularly the first President Bush. He became the president of Texas A&M University in August 2002. The university is home to the presidential library of the elder Bush.

The more things change, the more they stay the same...

I Must Be Dreaming

Rumsfeld Resigns!

Win-Win!!

Dutch transportation planner Hans Monderman has been pushing his innovative
plans for improving traffic, and several towns in the Netherlands and Germany
have already signed on, according to an August report by the German news
organization Deutsche Welle. His proposals include eliminating traffic signs and
street markings, which he believes will force drivers to be careful as they hunt
for their destinations, and building children's playgrounds in median strips of
roads, figuring that drivers would surely slow down. [DW- World.de (Bonn,
Germany), 8-27-06]
http://www.newsoftheweird.com/archive/nw061022.html

Or, there will be fewer future drivers...

Drop Everything and Check Out This Site

The World's Flags Given Letter Grades

This is just brilliant. This is the kind of opinion/research I aspire to, and it's a great way to waste some serious time. I mean really, what else is the internet for? Thanks to Kane Citizen for pointing it out!

But North Korea higher than Iceland? I don't think so.


Are Maseratis registered free in Barbados? Too bad it's too small to get one up to speed...

Spooky Savings!

Caramel Reese’s Peanut Butter cups – was $4.24, now $1.06
Indian Corn – was 1.68, now .42*
Fake Barbed Wire – was 1.94, now .42
Paper Lantern – was 1.00, now .25
Pumpkin that lights up, w/batteries – was 2.94, now .73
Spider Napkin Large – was 1.24, now .31
Smarties candy – was 2.00, now .50
Votive Holder w/Owls – was 1.00, now .25
M&M Fun Size bags – was $4.24, now $1.06
Snickers Fun Size – was $4.24, now $1.06
Spider Napkin small – was 1.24, now .31
Spider Plate– was 1.24, now .31
Tombstone that lights up, w/batteries – was 3.76, now .94
PLUS a gallon of milk $2.49
_________________________________
Equals being really popular at work, making Al happy (liked M&M’s), and all geared up for next Halloween for only $10.49 including tax!
Pretty good for “I just need a gallon of milk”! Score!!

*all they had was the brown. I like yellow better. But hey, forty-two cents.


Ok, so I like to seek out bargains and save a few bucks. But I will tell you one thing, I’ll never do the ‘doc in a box’ thing again. Went to my local 24 hour super store and got an eye exam because it was $20 cheaper than any place else. First off, I didn’t like the fact that the only frames they had to pick from were also horribly cheap. Oh well, I wanted to try contacts, so no biggie. Now the whole theory behind going to the local MegloMart is to get extended convenient hours of operation and low, low prices. I just saw a cartoon recently where it shows people at a cocktail party. One couple and one woman are ‘normal size’, holding little martini glasses. Beside the woman is a giant man, head and shoulders out of the frame. Caption: I met him at Costco. I thought it funny.

So I was having problems with the right contact and called for an appointment. A woman whose first language wasn’t English answered. (Or second, or third… ) She asked if she could put me on hold. Sure. Minutes passed. I hung up.

Next day I get the same woman. She says she is with a customer, can she take a number and call back? Yes. Hours pass. I go home from work.

Next day I find the message. She did try to call back. I call again. She can’t find my chart. Who cares, I finally say, after spelling my name for the fourth time and waiting while she rifles note cards. (They’re too cheap for full-size file folders or computer entry) Insists I must see the same doctor. She continues to search as if I had just dropped my contact lens in a parking lot of broken glass. Wait! No, maybe… over here…

I thought the whole point of this was seeing Dr. Du Jour! So she uses the high-tech method of asking me when I last came in and starts flipping backwards through the desk calendar to see who was on duty that day.

Right before I’m about to scream, Kane Citizen puts a posty note on my desk that says “The blind treating the blind”.

Thank God for friends!

Hate to admit it, but I’m going back there tomorrow night for a flu shot. I mean, if I’m optimistic enough to go vote…

After you lick my bad eye, perhaps we can go for a walk?

Dear Santa

I've been really good, and look great in red...




Not even Rudolph could catch this!

No Wonder I'm Confused...

You Are: 40% Dog, 60% Cat

You and cats have a lot in common. You're both smart and in charge - with a good amount of attitude. However, you do have a very playful side that occasionally comes out!

Are You More Cat or Dog?

Figured as much...

Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence

You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well. An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly. You are also good at remembering information and convicing someone of your point of view. A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary. You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

It was a Harpy Eagle!

...and it was South America, not Africa. Sorry.

Photo Appreciation

One of many variations of the emblem

Made my way to the Mirage where they had one white tiger on display to the public. Despite the distance, I was able to take some fantastic pictures of him, but for some reason they won’t post here, they are too big. Perhaps someone has some advice as to how to save them as a smaller file for posting? Anyhoo, the tiger was quite interested in what was going on beyond the ‘door’ to his enclosure. It was a little walk door where the keepers could enter. Perhaps this is where he was fed, or it could have even been the door they had him enter the public viewing area through, I’m not quite sure. After a few minutes of photo-taking, it was time for me to head out to the Polo Club for the free 3 p.m. showing of the Bird Man of Las Vegas. Once again, you get what you pay for.

A guy came out with a few trained parrots and cockatoos, and one rare eagle, whose name escapes me at the moment. It’s the type with the frilled feathers on the neck from Africa… brown… I’ll think of it at 2 a.m. and not be able to rest until I do an update! Right when he brings out the eagle, my camera battery decides to die, so I don’t have much in the way of photos. The whole show was about 20 minutes. Oh, well.

That evening we went to the art gallery in the Bellagio and saw an Ansel Adams exhibit. I was never a fan, but the exhibit was so educational I must say I’m a convert. It cost $15 and included an audio tour. Well worth it! I really appreciate his dedication to the preservation of nature and his conservation efforts.

The next morning I decided to hang out at the pool, as the Bellagio has a spectacular court yard with three swimming areas, fountains, and a poolside café. I intended to eat breakfast at the café, but the line for the nine a.m. opening was already a block long and it was cool in the shade at that time, so I didn’t want to wait 15 minutes as I didn’t bring a sweater. I headed to an inside restaurant whose theme was Siena’s Palio horse race.

A sign on the wall explained that around the 11th century A.D. the city state of Siena had 17 military companies that upheld the state’s independence from Florence. Each ward was very loyal to its regional traditions, and had its own coat of arms. A tradition of holding a horse race began, and there were few if any, rules enforced. Jockeys could beat each other, or other horses, and a horse did not need a rider to cross the finish line first and be declared a winner.

All around the seating area were porcelain plates and ceramic tiles depicting the coats of arms, and of course the one that caught my eye was the tortoise. If you think betting on a tortoise in a race is stupid, I must hasten to add there is also a snail. So I’m standing in line to place an order for extremely overpriced baked goods, I notice a bunch of banners hanging overhead. Below them is a rack of little black envelopes with each emblem peeking out. I pick up the only tortoise on the rack and turn it over to reveal a 12. Cool! A flag for $12. I’m getting this!

Then I select my egg and ham baked in a roll, turtle coffee drink and a biscotti type thingie and hand over the flag and my credit card. $37.95. What?!
Turns out the turtle was “number 12” and the cost of the flag was $22! Let’s not discuss the $15 breakfast, ok? Fortunately there were some little jars of marmalade and honey at the swanky condiment station that found their way into my purse (great stocking stuffers) but that really didn’t put a dent into the transaction. Upon opening the package, I discover it isn’t a banner at all – it was a square scarf. I love scarves, so I’m happy, but I must note it is not silk! Although made in Italy, it is 100% polyester. Whee.

Enjoyed people-watching at the pool: fake, fake, fake, real, that’s not her father, who is she kidding, fake, fake, had work done….
They had the swankiest changing area at this pool, decorated with chandeliers and opulent fixtures, mirrors, fancy shower stalls, every thing. Very nice, I totally recommend it. Especially if some one else is footing the bill, as in our case. No way could we have afforded this on our own.

Next Post: Where can I buy some of your software?

Thin-Blooded

Three people have died from lack of platelets tonight, and it’s all my fault.

It’s been so bitterly cold here, and what with the time change and all, my hibernation instincts have kicked in. All I am doing is eating sugar and starch, and I can’t wait to leave work each day so I can go home and sleep on the couch. Not too conducive to blog posting, much less calorie-burning. I should have gone to the health club last night, but canceled due to a lack of ambition. Then this morning I realized I had signed up to participate in a blood drive at the health club, so I missed that too.

Great. I’m fat, pimply due to excessive chocolate, and murderer.

Oh well. Nothing a six-month sleep can’t cure.

Works for me! Where do I sign up?

Like a Freudian Case Study

Not-So Immaculate Adoption?

OK, am I the only one who couldn’t figure out why a multi-billionaire like Madonna would adopt a child with a living parent who could speak out? Whether you believe Malawi orphan David’s father was mis-translated, mis-quoted, confused, or downright duplicitous, it seems a foolish move. Isn’t being rich all about NOT following the law to adopt? Making sure bio mom and dad are out of picture permanently so you can have this Walt Disney moment where you take in this poor little unfortunate was of great importance in years past. See Joan Crawford for a textbook case.

Not Madonna – she has to make a statement about her own sad upbringing. Like herself, she picks a child (albeit opposite sex, what would Freud say about that?) bereft a mother. On the one hand, she gets to be this mythic Mother figure she herself lacked. I’m sure she created quite a female fantasy figure growing up raised by a single father, and now she wants to play it out to heroic effect. But she takes the analogy one step further – by adopting a child with a living father, she is saying her own father should never been allowed to raise a child alone.

Legal adoption - $12,000
Helping an African village - $2 million dollars.
Getting to rewrite your personal history – priceless.